Ask The Experts: How to Tell the Difference Between a Wedding Trend and Something You Actually Love

Choosing a design concept for your wedding can be surprisingly daunting. One minute you’re casually saving some pretty tablescapes, and the next you’ve got hundreds of pins and a camera roll full of screenshots. With social media serving up a new must-have every time you scroll, it’s no wonder so many couples end up more overwhelmed than inspired.

That said, there’s a big difference between something that’s having a moment and something that feels like you. Trends come and go (and there’s nothing wrong with enjoying some along the way!), but the best details are the ones you’ll smile at when you’re flipping through your photos years from now. So, before you commit to that viral backdrop or this season’s colour palette, here’s how to tell whether it’s a fad or something worth making part of your big day.

How to Tell the Difference Between a Wedding Trend and Something You Actually Love

 photo by Elephantgrapgy – full wedding here

Go back to before you started planning

Before the mood boards and venue tours, you probably had a few ideas about how a wedding should feel. Maybe it was the long, candlelit table at a cousin’s reception or the wildflowers at a friend’s barn. Those early impressions are the clearest clue to what matters to you.

Ariana Straznicky-Packer, Founder & Lead Violinist at Ariana Strings, suggests, “Go back to your very first ideas, before you ever started planning your wedding, to reconnect with your true style. What dress idea did you sketch out on a napkin? What songs make you and your best friends immediately jump up and start singing? What’s your favorite food for date night? All of those are easy clues that tell you more about who you are, your love story, and your style—and they may not have anything to do with what you’re seeing on social media today.”

What have you always loved about weddings, whether you were a guest, bridesmaid, or starry-eyed kid watching from the sidelines? Jot down whatever comes to mind, even if it seems small. Chances are, the things that have stuck with you for years are more you than anything that popped up on your feed last week.

photo by Him & Her Photography – full wedding here

Visualize before hopping on social media

It’s so tempting to open Instagram or Pinterest the moment you get engaged, but starting there can mean your vision is shaped by everyone else’s before you’ve had a chance to form your own. Instead, sit down together and talk through what you both picture.

“Just talk among yourselves about what your dream wedding would look like,” encourages Patrícia Esteves, Wedding Planner at Peach Perfect Weddings. “What are the elements that you want to be there? What is the theme? What decor do you want? Once you are set on it, then that would be the perfect time to look online for inspiration.”

Once you’ve got that list, social media becomes a helpful tool for bringing those ideas to life rather than a firehose of options pulling you in a dozen directions.

Myriam Ménard, Owner & Founder of Myriam Ménard, agrees, adding, “Ask why you’re actually getting married, not what your wedding should look like, but why this person, why this commitment, what matters most to you both. Once you know that, you reverse engineer everything else from it; the concepts and the way you choose to celebrate build themselves from that truth instead of from a mood board.”

Starting from the heart of your relationship rather than the latest scroll gives every decision more meaning, and it makes it far easier to spot which ideas belong in your celebration. Keep that sense of purpose close as you plan, and you’ll end up with a wedding that’s unmistakably yours.

photo by  Hipster Wedding Asia – full wedding here

Pause first

We’ve all been there: you spot something gorgeous online, and within seconds you’re convinced your wedding won’t be complete without it. That rush of excitement is lovely, but it isn’t always the most reliable guide.

“My best advice is to pause on anything you’re drawn to and try to explain why you love it,” outlines Armana Christianson, Owner & Cake Artist at A. Cakes Bakery. “If your answer is mostly that it’s everywhere right now or that it got a ton of likes, that’s usually a sign the trend is talking. If you can connect it to something about who you are as a couple, like where you met or how you want your guests to feel, then I’d say go for it, because that’s the kind of detail people really remember.”

Save it, step away for a week or two, and see how you feel when you come back. If you’re still just as excited, brilliant! It’s probably a keeper. But if the spark has faded (or you’ve fallen for three other things since), that’s a sign it was more of a passing crush than true love.

photo by Lucy Lloyd Jones Photography – full wedding here

Take a trend and put your spin on it

Appreciating a trend doesn’t mean you have to recreate it exactly as you’ve seen it. In fact, some of the most memorable wedding details are the ones where couples take a popular idea and make it personal.

McKenna Shano, Owner & Lead Designer at McKenna Katherine Weddings, shares, “Take the element you love about the trend and ask how it can tell a piece of your story. If personalized cocktail experiences are trending, feature a drink you always order together when you go out on date night. If vintage details are having a moment, incorporate your family photographs, heirlooms, or pieces that actually have meaning to you. Even something as simple as a trending color palette can be adjusted to include shades, textures and materials that feel more reflective of your personal style.”

The beauty of this approach is that it works for almost any detail you can think of. A floral trend might become a chance to include blooms from your mum’s garden, while a popular grazing table could have a dish made from a family recipe passed down for generations. Personal twists like these turn an on-trend idea into a moment that could only belong to the two of you.

photo by  Estefanía Herrera Photography – full wedding here

When you do pick a trend, go all in

Once you’ve found a trend you love, don’t be shy about it. A single, confident choice will almost always make a bigger impact than five tentative ones.

“Get the best version you can afford of whatever it is that you are inspired by,” recommends McKenzi Taylor, Founder/Owner at Cactus Collective Weddings. “Finding a trend you can connect with and want to use is great. But if you go halfway with it, then what’s the point? If you settle for a small usage of the trend, it will feel like an afterthought. Make it sing by really leaning into it.”

A bold colour palette you’ve fallen for can carry through your florals, stationery, and tablescapes, while a statement installation can be the centrepiece that stands out in your photos. Committing fully not only looks more cohesive in photos, but also helps you spend your budget on what matters most, rather than spreading it thinly across everything.

photo by Lucy Davis – full wedding here

Remember: this is your day

With so many ideas competing for your attention, it’s easy to lose sight of the fact that this celebration is about your relationship. Trends will come and go, but the memories you make on the day are what you’ll carry with you for decades.

Irene Katzias, Wedding Designer at Irene + Co Events, emphasizes, “Don’t just chase trends. Remember the essence of your vision and stay true to yourself. Be as authentic as possible in every decision you make. I promise, if you always have a guiding principle in your wedding planning journey, the day will feel much more meaningful.”

By all means, enjoy the inspiration and borrow the bits that speak to you, but don’t feel pressured to keep up with every new idea that does the rounds.

Nicole Back, Photographer & Videographer at Nicole&Photo, confirms, “Try not to feel the pressure from all of the social media trends going on; trends are forever changing, and you want your day to be something that you’ll always love, not just what was popular in the 2020s.”

photo by fleur challis photography – full wedding here 

Trends can be a wonderful source of inspiration, and it’s fun stumbling across an idea that makes you both light up. The key is learning to recognise which details reflect who you are as a couple and which caught your eye on a busy afternoon of scrolling. Trust your instincts, give yourselves time to decide, and let your own story guide the choices you make!

This is a collaborative post with Meghan Ely who is the owner of wedding PR and marketing firm OFD Consulting and the founder of OFD Collective, a membership community for wedding pros looking to elevate their visibility. She’s a sought-after speaker and a self-professed royal wedding enthusiast.