22

Oct

2014

Advice From the Married Side – Real Brides Advice From Their Wedding Day

advice from the married side

It’s been a while (a few months actually!) but this afternoon I am pleased to welcome back one of my favourite features ‘Advice from the Married Side’. I have so many amazing real weddings on the blog and for each one I feature I ask the couple a number of questions, one of these questions being advice for other couples. Sometimes the answers get lost amongst the pretty pictures, so each month I bring you a selection of these brides (and grooms) words of wisdom! I hope there will be something amongst these experiences that help you while planning your own wedding……….Happy Planning!

1a-Swedish-Wedding-By-Fotografmatlida

Photo By Fotografmatlida

Planning 

  • Make sure you have a clear idea of the timings. Dave and I got married at 12pm and I wouldn’t change it. It felt we had more time to spend with our family and friends
  • Make sure you plan who is going to help you and when this so that you don’t end up carrying your own wedding presents home in a bucket or having to ring around to make sure your venue is emptied on time on the morning after
  • People shouldn’t be put off doing a registry office wedding and then doing a ceremony outdoor later, make a weekend out of it – we had an amazing time.
  • Enjoy every minute of the build up , the day is so short.
  • Plan it as you and your partner want it, not to suit any one else’s ideas. It’s your day so let the day reflect your personality.
  • Enjoy the whole process! Being engaged should be a very special time.
  • Enjoy yourselves, it’s too easy to get bogged down in details.
  • Don’t overdo the planning as nothing is worth that sort of stress. Just plan your day for how you want it
  • Enjoy the planning phases and use it as an opportunity to express yourselves and learn about each other. Even though we had been together for 4-5 years (living together for 3-4) when we were organising the wedding we learnt so much about each other’s tastes and expectations.
1a-Spring-Wedding-in-Wales-By-Photography-34

Photo by Photography 34

On The Day 

  • Stay calm and enjoy every moment because it goes so fast!
  • It goes so quickly. Everyone says that but it really does. Take a step back and take it all in!
  • Things will go wrong or not exactly to plan – a few things with us did but we realised it didn’t matter, we were married and happy and no-one else noticed so it didn’t matter!
  • Delegate, remember your only job is to look great and have fun. Make sure someone else is clock watching!
  • The day goes so quickly so you just need to embrace everything that happens and really stop to look at each other and say I love you
  • Take a few moments here & there to just stop & take everything in & smile.
  • Make sure you both see each other & make time to see each other as it can get very hectic
  • Take some time away during your day, we were given this advice from another couple and we are so pleased we took it! Thankfully we were whisked to take some shots away from the venue, this time was really special to us giving us the chance just to relax and enjoy the moment.
  • Also take it all in, everyone will tell you the day goes by in a whirlwind and it truly does. Enjoy every minute and appreciate that some things just won’t be exactly the way you want but other things will be beyond your expectations. Just enjoy every minute!

1a-Northumberland-Wedding-By-Lifeline-Photography

Photo by Lifeline Photography

Making The Wedding Personal

  • Try and create personal touches that reflect both yourself and your fiancée as a couple and create a vision of what you want rather than a theme, it doesn’t always have to match to look like a wedding.
  • You as the bride & groom should make the decisions and nobody else’s opinion matters, unless you ask for it of course!
  • Stick with your instincts and make the day how you want it. It’s so easy to get drawn in doing things because it’s the norm and trying to please everyone, but don’t!
  • Make sure that you have the day that you want, not the day that people tell you you should have because that’s how its normally done. We were so happy that we were able to do everything that we wanted
  • Don’t lose sight of what it’s about when planning it – it should be about the two of you celebrating being together – everything else is just detail.
  • Lots of people like to give their opinions when it comes to weddings… listen to them and take it on board the good advice but stick to your guns if you feel strongly about something. It’s your day and ultimately about you marrying the person you love.
  • The personal touches make the day feel so much more special.
  • Make sure it is what you want. You may have to compromise on certain aspects, but if you really think about it, it becomes apparent what really is important to you
  • Don’t be afraid to do something different, and choose things that are personal to you and that you’re excited by
1a-Wedding-with-a-Homemade-Wedding-Dress.-By-Paul-Joseph-Photography

Photo by Paul Joseph Photography

Getting Organised

  • Think about what you are spending your money on. Dave and I left a lot of things out as we knew it wouldn’t really add value to our day.
  • Don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s easy to get carried away with the details and spend a lot of cash doing what everyone else does. Just do whatever makes you happy – everyone is there to celebrate and have a good time.
  • Let your family and friends help if they offer – I was so touched by how many people wanted to help us. Also be willing to let things go if they aren’t working or you run out of time.
  • Prioritise what is important and what isn’t
  • It can be daunting when you start adding up costs, but it’s easy to save pennies by choosing an alternative… Like choosing sparkling wine instead of Champagne.
1-Vintage-Barn-Wedding-with-a-Candy-Anthony-Dress.-By-Tom-Halliday

Photo by Tom Halliday

DIY

  • Everything takes more time than you think make sure you start well in advance with especially if you want a lot DIY items.
  • If you are DIYing it, try to do as much as possible in advance – we ran out of time and only got everything finished because we were lucky to have so many generous people willing to get stuck in and help.
  • Ebay and local markets are useful places to get DIY/craft supplies.
  • If you do decide to go down the DIY route, start as early as possible and practice – no one will complain at sampling wedding cake
  • Diy makes your wedding really personal. It was wonderful that we could take our decorations home after the wedding and reuse them around the home – constant living memories.
1a-Alice-in-Wonderland-Wedding-By-Paul-Joseph-Photography

Photo by Paul Joseph Photography

General Advice

  • Start the celebrations early. Our guests started to arrive four days before the wedding and those few days were so special. We enjoyed BBQs, family cricket games and long summer evenings catching up with everyone. Plus, there were lots of helping hands to lug hale bales and tie bunting!
  • Although a child-friendly wedding is not for everyone, especially in more formal settings, we had forgotten just how magical the day can be for little ones. Their wide eyes, giggles and crazy dancing melted everyone’s hearts and they can add such special memories to the day. Think about ways to involve them if you can.
  • Spoil your guests. They have made the effort to be at your wedding. The gifts and cards they bring and they are there to see your special day.
  • We’d recommended staying elsewhere on the night just so you don’t end up with a constant procession of visitors on the day after
  • A Facebook ban on wedding photos posts by your guests is also a top tip.
  • Pinterest. It’s just brilliant for ideas. Many of the lovely touches that we had evolved from things that I had seen on Pinterest and made our own.
  • Get a good photographer! The day goes by so fast and your photos will last forever
  • Make sure you have scheduled time for couples shots in the evening the light is amazing and it is really worth missing the teas & coffee for
  • Walk really slowly down the aisle, enjoy looking at all your guests smiling back at you and just soak up the atmosphere as its over within a matter of seconds and you’ll only ever do it once in your life.
  • Pick your photographer carefully as your photos will be your memories forever Get all you friends and family involved in the planning.
  • Recommend a lot of research on Pinterest for inspiration!!
  • My only regret is not having a videographer to capture all those moments.
1a-Garden-Party-Wedding-By-Rebecca-Douglas

Photo by Rebecca Douglas

 

I hope you found these pieces of advice helpful. If you are already married is there anything you would like to add ? Was there anything in these words of wisdom that has resonated with you?

Is there something you would particularly like to ask me  for advice? any questions just email me [email protected]

 

 

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